The Logies invites are all set to be sent out and you
can be damn sure that it's the hottest ticket in town.
I can already picture the hopeful actors, camping out by their mailboxes - begging and pleading with their friendly mailman to hand them that prized invite. However scoring an invite is tough, forget Charlie and his golden ticket, the Logies are where it's at.
Luckily for you, once again, your friendly Logies Insider has some helpful (and maybe not-so-practical) tips to ensure you can attend the 55th annual TV WEEK Logie Awards.
Be an actor
"Oh that's so obvious." I can hear the criticism already. Well, yeah, if it's so obvious, why didn't you do it? Instead of working an IT job you absolutely hate, for minimal wage, in an office full of freaks, you could've been schmoozing on the red carpet, eating exotic canapés and drinking wine from, regions you can't even pronounce! Don't blame me; blame your lack of ambition.
Marry someone famous
You know who has probably been to Logies a thousand times? Daryl Somer's wife. Do you know her name? Of course not. For the record, it's Julie De Costa and she's a terrific ballet dancer. However the point remains - if you marry someone who is definitely going to be at the Logies, you're in the clear! At this point, logistics are working against you, what with the wedding planning, telling your respective families, sneaking in a honeymoon - it will be stressful. But it will be worth it.
Get a job at Crown Casino
Look, I know this may seem like I'm grasping at straws, but it's a start. The Logies are held at Crown Casino Melbourne. If fate falls your way, you could score a gig at Crown. Check. Try and tee up with your overworked, underpaid manager to pull an all-night shift on Sunday April 7th, 2013. Check. Bring something fancy to wear, so once you're inside the venue, people will assume you're a C-grade celebrity. Start your application here - www.crownjobs.com.au
Change your name to Logie Lover
In my humble (and in no way official) opinion, if you legally changed your name to Mr or Mrs Logie Lover, then the powers that be would have to let you attend the Logies. I mean honestly, if you went to deed poll, filled out all the appropriate forms, waited in all the painstaking queues, basically totally inconvenienced your life, then there'd be some obligation to give you a pity invite?
NB: I have been informed that this is not the case. Name change doesn't equal invite. Same deal applies to getting a Logie shaped tattoo. (That was my next suggestion.)